( This'll all be easier later, when he's not so amped up on-- adrenaline and anxiety and so much care in his direction that he could literally tear his hair out. He tried. He really fucking did. But he pushed himself too hard and now he wants to run along the beach until he's done several laps without turning around.
He feels-- bad for this. Really fucking bad. He shouldn't have done this today. He should've asked for another day. Another time. More time. Anything else to prepare himself. Or something. Fuck, he doesn't know what he needs, but he just-- needs something.
Why did the city force this? Why?
He looks up briefly when Charles touches his shoulder, then drops his head again. Right. Can't just leave him like this (even though he absolutely can) after all this. Another sigh and he drags his hand up the back of his head and shrugs. )
Sure. Don't think-- could get a room right now anyway. ( Speech is hard, and the last thing most of these motels want is to rent out a room to a lone Sub. At least if he goes in with another guy, one who can still speak clearly at that, clerks are less likely to turn him away on sight. )
no subject
He feels-- bad for this. Really fucking bad. He shouldn't have done this today. He should've asked for another day. Another time. More time. Anything else to prepare himself. Or something. Fuck, he doesn't know what he needs, but he just-- needs something.
Why did the city force this? Why?
He looks up briefly when Charles touches his shoulder, then drops his head again. Right. Can't just leave him like this (even though he absolutely can) after all this. Another sigh and he drags his hand up the back of his head and shrugs. )
Sure. Don't think-- could get a room right now anyway. ( Speech is hard, and the last thing most of these motels want is to rent out a room to a lone Sub. At least if he goes in with another guy, one who can still speak clearly at that, clerks are less likely to turn him away on sight. )